So the past few months have been… rough. To say the least. I don’t want to get into why, but the good news is: I am out of that situation. However, I have still been feeling rather sad. Probably because I’ve been doing super constructive things like asking myself “whhhhyyy did I let this happen to me!?” etc. To make matters worse, once the problem was put to bed, I was forced to look at the pile of work I have been too distracted to finish. It’s incredible how easily making a “To-Do” list can completely destroy any modicum of happiness you may be experiencing.
So. The other day I decided to actually take a break (what!? WHAT DO THOSE WORDS MEAN?) and not do a single school-related thing. all day. I was cleaning off my desk and I ended up with a small pile of To-Do lists from the past few weeks. I decided to hang them up and take a picture of myself in front of them – it was supposed to be a light-hearted zombie-esque photo, but instead this is what I was confronted with:
(click to enlarge) That is not a happy face. And this is how I look 95% of the time these days.
After seeing this picture, I kicked my ass into gear and now I am TURNING OVER A NEW LEAF. This is a great time of my life – I will never be this young again, I have an amazing husband and family (and kitties!), I love my peers, my advisor, my research… why am I feeling so down because of someone else? Why am I wasting this amazing (crazy) time!? I am almost halfway through my Master’s program (omfg). Is the next month going to be a nightmare as I scramble to finish my work? Hell yes. But soon enough, it will be over and I will miss it all.
Ok, now it’s time to work on my paper while blasting really cheesy “inspirational” songs…